Wednesday, January 05, 2005

Well, Crystal's been here for a week now. She's going home on Sunday, which is too bad. It's nice to have her around all the time. It's certainly easier to sleep.

It's interesting. Because she's here for a while, I've been trying to integrate her into the normal schedule of things, as well as keep a moderate schedule of work on. We've been seeing each other over weekends and holidays these last months, so we have become somewhat used to that kind of interaction. I don't know how well I've really been doing at it, but it feels.. much realer, more grounded. Of course, it's still special, and I'm not getting near my normal amount of work done.

We're going to Santa Barbara today, if all goes well, and then later in the week a few events with local friends.

The experience is oddly nostalgic. I'm sure I'll look back and wonder at the exact mix of stress, excitements, companionship, and professional satisfaction.

For example, today, leaving for Santa Barbara, I'm certainly glad to be going, I'm sure it will be fun. At the same time I'd like to just stay home, and I'm a little worried I might miss something at work, despite the fact I'll only /actually/ be gone for 25 hours or so, compared to the usual gaps of 3 days or more when I visit Crystal in SLC.

It'd be nice if I could get full measures of everything, be a loving boyfriend, have interesting hobbies, and work full time. Some people may be good at that sort of thing, but I just feel a little less competent at each task I add. Of course, having no choice rather leaves me in a unique position. at this point I'm just aiming at getting a bit better at my activities one at a time.

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