Wednesday, July 07, 2004

Adaptive Artificial Intelligence Inc. - Home

I just uploaded the latest and greatest news post on our company website, and upgraded our opportunities page. We're looking for brilliant minds, know anyone?

My time here has been very happy, and quite productive. In analysis, while my activity in most other areas is severely depressed by my isolation and focus, I am getting more concrete things accomplished than by working on my own. With a the serious plus that I'm contributing to a still greater pool of collective accomplishment, of course.

Also pluses that I know do interesting work full time. Which is actually more stressful than I would have thought. While I found part time work in unrelated fields stressful, I think I may have used it as a way to rest the less developed parts of my brain. Working here has re-introduced me to the pain of inadequate mental performance, having to self-limit work for quality, and etc. It's a good thing, though. I think my performance will ultimately rise permanently as a result of some of the mistakes I've made and learned from here.

The longer I work here, the more I think that A2I2 is really in front of anyone else in this game, and I'm glad I'm here. I do worry, occasionally, that I'm working the best I can, and being the most productive in the right places. It's not clear exactly what challenges and problems lie ahead, and I occasionally fear that I'll top out, and be unable to contribute usefully past a certain point. What would I do then? I've become very accustomed to following the edge of development, even if I lag behind in the implementation or details, in most everything I research. If I ever found anything to be honestly beyond me.. I can't really say what I would do.

And then the question would arise, what precisely can I do, in order to continue contributing towards my goals, which are currently predicated on the assumption that nothing in my path is beyond me personally. I can't very well expect others to carry me to my own goals. As much as I respect and like Peter, I can't measure by his capability and understanding, it's not mine.

Sometimes it seems like my future shrinks with each year. I can't say that I really even look much past a year from now anymore. When I was 18 I had my whole life planned out. It seems like that was a long long time ago.

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